Nice try, Colgate.
The other night I noticed that Colgate had, once again, improved their flavor. This struck me as rather suspicious, so I did a little research. Colgate as a company has been producing toothpaste in some form since 1873.  And yet it seems that several times a year the flavoring of their "classic" toothpaste is improved. So let's say that on average, Colgate toothpaste gets tastier on average twice a year. 2*135 years gives us a staggering 270 improvements to the formula. In other words, the toothpaste you are enjoying now tastes nearly 300 times better than the original... toothpaste? I question the word, because the need to improve a flavor that much suggests that the original Colgate was, in fact, poop in a tube. So please, the next time some elderly person complains to you about how easy we kids have it, stop to remember that they had to rub poop on their teeth with a shoe brush (remember, toothbrush technology has also improved at a remarkable rate). At least it was probably minty-fresh poo at that point.

I'm afraid I've got some rather bad news though; while the Yves Gerard project is still going strong, Tim and my latest endeavor, Howes South Dakota was cut down in its infancy. People get so bogged down with their lust for "facts," that they can't even be bothered to stop and see the beauty in things. Now tell me, which of the following would you rather read?

Howes, South Dakota

Howes is an unincorporated community located in Meade County, South Dakota. Although not tracked by the Census Bureau, Howes has been assigned the ZIP code of 57748. The unofficial population of Howes is 2 people.


or this...

Howes, South Dakota

Howes is an unincorporated community located in Meade County, South Dakota. Although not tracked by the Census Bureau, Howes has been assigned the ZIP code of 57748. Lack of state recognition has not prevented this small town with a big heart from making quite a name for itself. Lying neatly between Rapid City and Sioux Falls, Howes saw a brisk trade during the 1940's; specializing in the leather trade and spectacular rodeos in the spirit of Buffalo Bill, the small community became a hot spot for tourists and cowpokes looking for fast money. Howes's major claim to fame was the Oklahoma Steer. Following in the footsteps of "Clever Hans," "Bobby the Educated Steer" painted pictures, jumped cars, and even solved simple logic puzzles. After the completion of Interstate 90 in 1956, traffic through Howes dropped off dramatically, effectively destroying the business that had briefly flourished there, eventually leaving little more than a ghost town. The current population of Howes is estimated to be 2 people.

Hell, we even had a visual aid: